Food & Silly Things

Prompt: Name and describe five silly things you do.


  1. Pancakes must be eaten in stacks of three. I have no idea how this started, but I can’t think of anything (in relation to breakfast) more glorious than three evenly-buttered pancakes stacked on top of one another. But that’s not all! To get the perfect stack of pancakes, the syrup also has to be poured in a certain pattern. I always pour the syrup over my pancakes using three horizontal stripes, followed by three vertical stripes. (As I’m typing, I am feeling the sudden urge to post a YouTube video about this because I’m sure there is so much pancake injustice going on right now). I promise you, if you eat pancakes this way, you will never be disappointed with how they taste. The even-buttering makes it so that no one layer is too greasy, and the perfect striping of the syrup is to ensure that you can actually taste the pancake instead of drenching it in liquid sugar.
  2. Hash browns are best covered in syrup.  Speaking of proper syrup practices, I don’t really care about the way in which syrup is poured over my hash browns, as long as it’s there. I’m pretty sure I began doing this when I ordered pancakes with hash browns and some other side at restaurants (probably toast and eggs). My syrup would drip off the sides of my pancakes, onto my plate, and slowly work its way into my hash browns. I used to just eat them with the leftover syrup from my pancakes, but after a while I think I just decided hash browns deserve their own syrup. It’s the perfect combination of potato and sweet goodness. It’s incredibly delicious. Here’s the problem: I always have to ask for syrup to be brought to the table after my food arrives. Why? Does everyone really eat their hashbrowns dry?! That’s disgusting! And please, please do not tell me you eat hashbrowns with ketchup. They are not french fries! We are at breakfast, people. Act civilized and put syrup on your shredded potatoes.
  3. I have a specific order for each fast-food restaurant I eat at. McDonald’s? That’d be a #1 – Big Mac meal with a medium Coke. Taco Bell? Hello, #9 – Crunch Wrap Supreme with a crunchy taco and large Pepsi. Subway? Now this is the big one because I’ve been ordering the same sandwich since I was about 8 years old and I go there a lot. For this order, I get a 6-inch wheat sub with ham and American cheese. The veggies are lettuce, tomatoes, green peppers, black olives, banana peppers, and light mayo. I also get a meal – but I switch it up with the chips and cookies. I have a chip and cookie preference, but it gets a little complicated as soon as my first chip choice (baked sour cream and onion Lay’s) is out and unavailable for my taking. Anyway, a medium Coke goes with this order. I do this mostly because it’s easy and I never have to think about what I’m going to order while I’m in line. When I get up to the counter, I can immediately order without indecision. I also feel like I will be disappointed if one day I chose something different and hate it. Then I’ll just want to take it back and get my usual.
  4. I order tomatoes on my Subway sandwich and always pick one off. Subway employees put three tomatoes on my 6-inch sandwich. I started picking one off because when I put the sandwich up to my mouth to eat, the bottom tomato would start to slide out of the sandwich every single time. So, I would just pick off the bottom tomato and go on my merry way. Now I think it’s just habit. The tomato at the bottom of my sandwich always gets tossed aside. I should probably just start telling the Subway people to put two tomatoes on my sandwich, but now it’s tradition. So I guess the bottom tomato on my sandwich is forever doomed.
  5. Dairy must NEVER be shared… EVER. This may be the silliest thing I do, but my milk and ice cream is for me and me only. I have no logical explanation for this, so I will just leave you with it as is.

Ew… Puke. Ew!

Looking back, all of these deal with food… I promise, I really am not that picky. Some foods just have rules.