Holiday Haste

Alright, so today I was walking across campus minding my own business when this guy started walking behind me whistling. Usually, I have no problem if people whistle. Like, dude you’re all musically inclined and stuff and that’s awesome… do what you do, bro. But this guy… He decided that whistling “Deck the Halls” would be the perfect tune to jam out to on Halloween.

I really don’t like being a Scrooge, but really?! It’s barely even November and you’re already beckoning the snow, bad drivers, even worse shoppers, and awkward family gatherings? Really, Christmas is not that bad in my family (it’s actually one of my favorite holidays), but I do believe there is such a thing as “too soon” when it comes to spreading the holiday cheer.

Stores: I do not want to see your Christmas merchandise already. One holiday at a time, people! This year, I heard that some stores had already started setting up their Christmas aisles in September. That is nuts! There’s two big holidays in between September and December. I know it’s a sales thing, but dang guys, I can’t keep up.

Radio stations: If I hear a single sleigh bell before December 1st, I will boycott your station. Okay, not really, but please don’t make me listen to Jingle Bells until I puke.

Home Owners: I get that the whole Christmas season is a super fun and exciting time of the year, but chill on the decorations, y’all. Your oversized blow-up snow globe things do not need to be in your yard tomorrow. It is not okay to swap out your Halloween decorations for Christmas ones. Oh, by the way, please don’t do this either:

That’s called overkill. Don’t be that person.

So, to the guy whistling Christmas jams on Halloween: Sorry, bro, I just can’t get with that.